wake up..reality bites 2

uhm.. i can't think of any title that would best fit this entry. .. with that i apologize

last night before i left the office, i checked my multiply account, then, i got the chance to see his video. he sang for someone..and it's not for me. from that moment, i realized that i am a closed chapter in his life. before he left, we didn't have the chance to say goodbye. .. i would never realize that i would come to this point, that i could say to myself that i miss him. he's one of the most genuine persons i've ever known. he's worth keeping. i miss the friendship.. even if i have lots of friends, he will never be replaced. indeed, what is lost,is lost. i felt that i was never been fair to him. i can't do anything about it. i know, i'm sorry... i felt so guilty that i've hurt someone else's feelings because of the careless words that i've said.

after watching the video, i can't help but cry. i felt guilty... naghihinayang ako sa friendship(nothing more). but then, i realized, i have to let go. i don't need to be harsh on myself. i can't do anything about the past. that's why i'm focusing on the present. that's why after work, i went out last night. it so happened that some of my officemates is having their despedida party for these two australian trainers. i enjoyed the night, that i almost forget the feeling that i had. to make things even better, these two australian trainers thanked me for my contributions in the training program. as a training assistant, i was in charge of the logistics, which means that, i'm responsible for the manuals. they told me that, i did a great job. i was so glad to hear that.

i was really thankful that God lifted me up. he is there for me. imagine, i was down when i left the office, but after that , my morale was boosted. it's a good thing that i went out. naka-tulong sobra. so much for my past, i would just live for today. i would focus on the things things that God has in store for me. i actually have a choice, whether, to dwell on my past or move on. i chose the latter because i know that it is the right thing to do. i know that i made things that i would, regret later on. but i believe that no matter what happened in my past, he would still make my paths straight... Besides, God always bring people that would make feel valued.

one person lost, and i've learned my lesson. i thankful that these things happened, beacuse these things would make me become a better person...or the person that God wants me to be.

i don't know how this person would react if he would read this entry. basta, ako, i won't pretend. nasabi ko ung dapat masabi. i won't expect anything in return. whatever or whoever makes him happy. i'm also happy for him.

-this would be my first and last entry for this person-

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